Alex and Maddy

Alex and Maddy

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Sad, but okay

I know a lot of you have been worried about both Alex and I and I am sorry I haven't updated.

I'll start with Alex....Today he has been fever free all day. Praise God! He is still pretty puny, but he is talking a little more and his personality is back. I am so glad to see his little smile again. We will still be here a little while. We need to get him off oxygen, restart feeds, try a new seizure med and get his strength back before we can come home. I am thinking the end of next week.

Emotionally he is doing okay as well. Yesterday morning, Dr. Koenig, Stacy (child life), Glenda (chaplain) and me all came to talk to Alex together. I told him that Samuel had gone to heaven to be with Jesus. I asked him if he understood and he said that Samuel was playing and eating ice cream. Dr. Koenig talked to him about their differences adn why he doesn't have to worry. Later he told me that he didn't think Samuel needed oxygen anymore. I told him he also didn't need his port or tubes. Alex told me when he goes to heaven he still wants his tubes. Today he is asking more questions heaven and processing through his thoughts. Glenda and I have both talked to him and he seems pretty good. He also did some art for Lauren.

I am doing okay as well. I am surrounded by love and support. This is a great place for me to be. The staff here is like family to us. We have laughed and grieved together. We have shared hugs and tears. We have told stories about Samuel and comforted each other. I have spoken to Missy and her family and been a go between for many people. I appreciate all the messages, emails, texts, calls, etc. Please forgive me for not returning them all. I am emotionally exhausted.

Please continue to keep the Knights in your prayers. Lauren could especially use some extra thoughts. We all miss Samuel, but are so happy he is finally free of all his tubes and hurt, free to play and eat all day.



  1. Ali,
    I have been worried about you guys. I have been a basketcase since finding out about Samuel and you and Missy and the kids are so close, I know it has to be awful for you.
    It sounds like you did a great job telling Alex about Samuel's new life in heaven. I am so glad you had so much support!
    I am also so glad that Alex is feeling better!
    I am hoping to attend Samuel's service - we are slated for 3 hospital days/nights next week but Henry should be out on Wed and then back on Thursday.
    Huge hugs to you - you and Alex are in my prayers.

  2. Ali, Glad to hear that you and Alex are hanging in there. I've been thinking of you both and praying for you. So glad you are surrounded by love and support. ((hugs))

  3. So glad to see Alex is fever free and feeling more himself. Im Heartbroken over Samuel, he was a brave little boy and will be surely missed by everyone. Im glad you and Alex have lots of support during this difficult time. Continued prayers for your little man, hoping he's home real soon.