Find your Wings

Find Your Wings

It's only for a moment you are mine to hold

The plans that heaven has for you

Will all too soon unfold

So many different prayers I'll pray

For all that you might do

But most of all I'll want to know

You're walking in the truth

And if I never told you, I want you to know

That as I watch you grow

I pray that God would fill your heart with dreams

And that faith gives you the courage

To dare to do great things

I'm here for you whatever this life brings

So let my love give you roots

And help you find your wings

I shared this song a few months ago on Alex's birthday. It is everything I have prayed and wished as I have gone through this summer leading up to today. There are so many emotions on this day. As I look back there are so many moments and memories. I can still remember the absolute joy of finding out I was pregnant. I remember the many hours in those first few years I spent cuddling and singing and reveling in the fact that I was a mom, my lifelong dream. I remember the devastation when we realized that you had a life threatening disease. I can visualize the many nights (close to a thousand) that we have spent in the hospital. I can see the little boy who was stuck over and over with needles never fighting the doctors and nurses and thanking them as they left. I remember the fear as you asked me to pray for you as they wheeled you into surgery yet again. I remember the hours we have spent playing games, watching shows and laughing. I see your strength, your confidence, your faith and your determination to do what is right and make this world a better place. Alex, you are so much more than I ever could have hoped or dreamed for. I cannot count the number of times I have been told that you have changed someone's life; That you have inspired someone and that they are different for having known you. God created you with a gift for touching others with your charisma, your joy and your ability to overcome an incredibly hard life.

As we enter this new chapter, I think of all the amazing people we have seen met on this journey and all of the blessings we have received. I asked you once if you wished your life was different. I should not have been surprised when you said if you had the choice you wouldn't want it different. You would choose to go through everything again to have this life and the people and experiences that have shaped it.

To my precious Bug,

 For so many years I dreaded the day I would have to say goodbye because I always believed it would be a goodbye until I joined you in heaven. What an amazing blessing that instead I will say goodbye to you on the campus of DBU as you prepare to start a new adventure. You and I have spent almost all of your time on earth side by side. We have cried together, laughed together and shared the fear of death together. Through it all we have been each others partners in so many ways. Our relationship is so much more than mother and son as nothing about your life has been normal. Through it all we have managed to keep love and faith at the center of our relationship. I could not ask for a better son. You love well, you are smart, you are funny, you are quick to apologize when you are wrong, you care about your people so dearly. You have been the BEST brother and mentor to Moo. Watching your relationship has been the greatest joy of my life. Bug, you and Maddy are my greatest joy and my best accomplishments. And so I have no doubt that as you start your life at DBU, you will continue to touch lives, to overcome hard times and to live into the amazing man God created you to be. Find your wings, Alex! I am so incredibly proud of you!

Mom